For whatever reasons, young Fives felt that the only way to become independent was to make themselves not want nurturing and emotional connection with their mothers. Thus, — *location: 5276* ^ref-5207 --- To leave the safety of their minds, to reoccupy the body and feelings, is to reexperience the primal frustration and anguish of their infant selves. — *location: 5286* ^ref-60075 --- Even to want something ordinary too much could upset their inner security; thus adult Fives go through life avoiding the things they most want, repressing their longing and finding substitute pleasures in their interests, hobbies, and creativity. — *location: 5288* ^ref-3262 --- Fives with a Six-wing identify strongly with key people in their lives. Not — *location: 5322* ^ref-30217 --- actively antagonize people who disagree with them. — *location: 5323* ^ref-47123 --- In the average range, Social Fives engage with others and find a social niche for themselves through their knowledge and skill. They like to see themselves as Masters of Wisdom and want to become indispensable through their particular field of expertise (the only person in the office who knows how to fix the computer, for example). — *location: 5349* ^ref-12721 --- In the unhealthy range, Social Fives tend to express extreme and provocative views. They are often anarchistic and antisocial, heaping derision on the human race, seeing it as nothing more than a ship of fools. They can develop bizarre theories about society or reality but, unlike Self-Preservation Fives, are determined to propound them to others. — *location: 5358* ^ref-6986 --- In the unhealthy range, longing for lost love and feelings of rejection can lead Sexual Fives into isolation and self-destructive behavior. They are often drawn, through voyeurism, into dangerous lifestyles and can be attracted to society’s underbelly. — *location: 5375* ^ref-6109 --- Whenever Fives feel overwhelmed by people or circumstances, instantly and reflexively they detach from direct engagement with their senses and emotions and retreat into their minds. — *location: 5426* ^ref-3724 --- But moving their attention more completely into the Inner Tinker Toy causes Fives to abstract and conceptualize the world rather than experience it directly, and this inevitably leads to a loss of contact with Essential guidance. — *location: 5446* ^ref-51971 --- Physical activities and athletics are typically a source of shame for Fives, a reminder of something they were not able to master. — *location: 5459* ^ref-40471 --- because Fives feel that they must spend most of their time developing their ideas and interests, they do not want anyone to take too much of their time or attention. — *location: 5477* ^ref-15835 --- Average Fives often get locked into what we call preparation mode. — *location: 5491* ^ref-46972 --- Their emotional needs and desires are deeply repressed. Beneath their defenses, this causes Fives pain, of course, but they are able to disconnect from their feelings about their loneliness so they can function. — *location: 5525* ^ref-7188 --- Because their own ideas are virtually the only source of security Fives have, they propound and defend them with passion—even though they may not actually even believe the position they are taking themselves. — *location: 5637* ^ref-36290 --- They are offended by others’ apparent peace of mind, and they enjoy subverting and undermining people’s beliefs. — *location: 5641* ^ref-55279 --- If Fives are unable to find a niche for themselves, they can quickly fall into a cynical apathy, losing faith in themselves and in the entire human condition. — *location: 5646* ^ref-7328 --- After cutting off from their needs, especially sensory and nurturing needs, Fives going to Seven act out by searching indiscriminately for stimulation and experience. — *location: 5660* ^ref-41891 --- Remember that your mind is clearest and most powerful when it is quiet. — *location: 5691* ^ref-57451 --- What arises when you simply take in an impression of the moment without connecting it with what you think you already know? — *location: 5693* ^ref-6193 --- allow yourself to sense your heart and the feelings that are locked there. — *location: 5709* ^ref-14969 --- ​​As you become more balanced and grounded in your body, let your impressions of others and of the world around you affect you—let the world in. You will not lose yourself, you will gain the world. — *location: 5711* ^ref-14868 --- Further, deeper contact with the body begins to allow powerful feelings of grief and sorrow over Fives’ long isolation to come into awareness. — *location: 5750* ^ref-35512 --- As they learn to stay with their instinctual energies, Fives begin to participate more fully in their worlds and to apply their knowledge and skill to immediate practical problems. — *location: 5752* ^ref-17748 --- By joining the real world, Fives do not lose their mental abilities or the expertise they cultivated in isolation; rather, they harness those gifts strategically and constructively like high-functioning Eights. — *location: 5755* ^ref-52007 --- When we are really present to life, when we are relaxed and engaged in our bodies, we begin to experience an inner knowing or guidance. We are led toward exactly what we need to know and our choices come from this inner wisdom. But when we lose the ground of Presence out of which this Essential guidance emerges, the personality takes over and tries to figure out what to do. — *location: 5763* ^ref-54992 --- The answer to a question arises not from a chattering brain but from a clear mind that is attuned to reality. — *location: 5771* ^ref-36594 --- In this state, they are liberated from the belief that they are cut off from everyone and everything, and instead, they directly experience their underlying connection with everything around them. — *location: 5793* ^ref-30762 --- Their belief is that from the safety of their minds, they will eventually figure out how to do things—and one day rejoin the world. “What’s — *location: 5198* ^ref-65294 --- much of their time gets spent collecting and developing ideas and skills they believe will make them feel confident and prepared. — *location: 5235* ^ref-61132 --- Fives do not expect anything from others, except to be left alone to pursue their own interests unimpeded by anyone else’s demands or needs, especially their emotional needs. — *location: 5268* ^ref-16515 --- nonintrusion—is therefore sought by Fives as a way of attaining safety and the feeling that they have control of their lives. — *location: 5270* ^ref-52052 --- Less healthy Social Fives become unable to relate to others except through the role of their expertise. — *location: 5355* ^ref-38547 --- But they are always experiencing some degree of tension between pursuing those they are attracted to and lacking confidence in their social skills. — *location: 5364* ^ref-59422 --- they can cause others surprise and consternation when they unexpectedly drop out and disappear for periods of time. — *location: 5367* ^ref-14466 --- when they feel unappreciated or misunderstood, they can quickly become emotionally distant. — *location: 5369* ^ref-12471 --- Fives feel as though there is not much of them to go around, and that the needs of others can easily deplete or exhaust them. — *location: 5472* ^ref-63269 --- The types of the Thinking Triad attempt to make up for the loss of inner guidance by developing strategies. The Five’s strategy is to get through life by not asking much of it, while hoping that in return others will not ask much of them. — *location: 5554* ^ref-50629 --- They get high-strung and intense and start to ignore their own physical and emotional needs. — *location: 5566* ^ref-54594 --- their thinking is more aimed at keeping their practical and emotional problems at bay than at really attempting to explore or create. — *location: 5584* ^ref-43642 --- No longer — *location: 5644* ^ref-9095 --- careful thinkers, they jump to conclusions and impose their own extreme interpretations of the facts. — *location: 5644* ^ref-50511 ---